SHMOOZE NEWS: Prez 2.0, Womensplainin’, and Fooooood

Wha’ Happened This Week.  So You’re Never LATE TO THE PARTY.

1.The President’s second term has begun!  May the odds be ever in his favor.  (But, like, for reals.)  On Martin Luther King day, Obama took the oath of office in front of millions & gave… a not so bad speech.

SATP obama reintroduceYou guys, this particular Obama, as opposed to the Obama before reelection, is comin’ out of the closet — as a full-blown liberal.  And it’s hot!  As Charles M. Blow at the New York Times said, his speech was an “unapologetic, unequivocal progressive manifesto.”  Boom.  This Obama avoided touching on topical topics like the economy & instead aimed for the massive movement toward a more perfect union:

What makes us exceptional — what makes us American — is our allegiance to an idea, articulated in a declaration made more than two centuries ago: ‘We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal,’ […] Today we continue a never-ending journey, to bridge the meaning of those words with the realities of our time. For history tells us that while these truths may be self-evident, they have never been self-executing.

As in, we need to work to help the poor, ensure equal pay for women, acknowledge the fight for gay rights among the other major civil rights movements in our country’s history, and keep our children are safe, which hey, means taking care of the environment now for the very long term.  ‘Cuz it won’t happen on its own, he said.

Michelle didn’t get to say much during the festivities so all we have to go on is how awesomely she deals with Boehner & how beautifully she dances with her hubs buttressed by a sea of cell phones.

SATP obamas dancing2. This was a big week for the ladies.  And no, I’m not referring to Beyonce’s vocal folds.  Hillary Clinton was finally done “faking” her blood clot so she could attend her Congressional hearing and “fake” her emotional response to questions surrounding her involvement in the Benghazi drama — and despite all that ridiculous vitriol, it went well.  Hillz on the Hill!

SATP benghaziReally, if Congress was trying to take a swipe at her before she leaves her post as Secretary of State this week, and leave some shmutz on her face, ummm… nope.

SATP clinton approvalBut the best, viralest response to come outta the GOP shitshow was hands down this GIF-laden article called “How to Deal with a Mansplainer, Starring Hillary Clinton.”  Click for your own good.

In other lady news: the ban on women in combat has lifted!  Obviously an even bigger triumph would be “the need for combat has ended!” but, ehem, in the meanwhile, this is huge —  not because it’ll actually change who’s fighting, but rather it’ll honor the women who are already in battle despite the old policies:

Defense Secretary Leon Panetta, who overturned the ban this week, and the Joint Chiefs of Staff, who unanimously urged him to do it, deserve praise for bringing military policy in line with reality. Women have been in the thick of combat in Iraq and Afghanistan for more than a decade. More than 280,000 have been deployed there, thousands have been injured and more than 150 killed. With the rule abolished, such service and sacrifice will no longer be unofficial and unrecognized.

Of course not everyone’s thrilled — especially because we live in a crazy country where bold steps forward are often accompanied by clumsy steps backward, like some really lame choreography:SATP rapeYep, here’s some bad lady news: this woman — Rep. Cathrynn Brown of New Mexico — wants to charge rape victims who elect to have an abortion as FELONS.  Considering that the state’s legislature is controlled by Democrats it’s not really gonna pass… it’s just gonna get a lot of attention and creep a lot of us out.

SATP natural state rapist3. Something light ‘n fun!  Like… garbage!  The UN says that somewhere between a third & half of all food produced gets wasted — either ‘cuz it’s not pretty enough to shelve at the grocery store or serve at your favorite gastropub, or just ‘cuz it falls through the cracks.  They’re cracking down globally.  <– that article has a few ideas of little things we can each do, too.  Doing things = good.

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Quote of the week, in honor of MLK day:

SATP MLK beggars

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